snoWatch: Success at last?

Here at snoWatch, we have many talents - predicting the weather, being funny and juggling with swords, to name a few. But tonight we unearthed a new talent - number-crunching. (And that too without the help of our technical staff!)

After a detailed analysis of the school year in precipitation, we found some disheartening figures. The days with the most snow? The five-day weekend after semester exams. The number of two-hour delays? Three. The number of times after-school activities were canceled? Two. The instances where rain has affected school times? One. But the number of snow days off? Zero.

The effects of this drought are seen all around. With tax dollars already stretched thin, the county simply can't afford to keep us in school for the extra four built-in snow days. So tonight we turn not to the snow gods (no offense, we're still worshiping you) but to the county heads - do the smart move and close schools tomorrow. After all, it will be George Washington's birthday, and everyone knows his dream for America was for peace, prosperity and a little less school.

Predictions - where we make up fake numbers based on actual facts

Chance of delayed opening: 95 percent

There is a 70 percent chance of snow between the hours of 2 a.m. and 5 a.m., with temperatures well below the special 32 degrees, according to weather.com. And if rain can delay schools for two hours, then we can almost guarantee that you won't be fighting the rush-hour traffic tomorrow morning.

Chance of closing: 80 percent

Being the fine journalists that we are, we always double check our facts. So tonight we'd like to cite Magnet science teacher Robert Donaldson, who assures us that the chance for our first snow day of the year is indeed 80 percent. But don't get too cocky: make sure to do your homework (the snow gods are known to strike the lazy with miserable school days), turn those slumber party pajamas inside-out and do a quick snow dance before you jump into bed.

snoWatch Fact (because we really are weather experts):

Today's snoWatch Fact isn't exactly a piece of Jeopardy trivia, it's a lifelong skill. Learning to do a correct snow dance is the only way to ensure that your alarm clock can be set for a time much more appropriate than 6 a.m., like say, 2 p.m. After doing some research on Yahoo! Answers, we found foolproof steps to the perfect snow dance.

1. Rip a piece of notebook paper (preferably college ruled) into small pieces.
   
2. Turn on music (maybe some Spice Girls, in celebration of their concert this evening) and dance until you get tired.
   
3. While dancing, scatter the pieces of paper (they represent...snow).
   
4. When you finish dancing, pick up the papers and place them underneath your pillow.
   
5. Sleep and dream of sledding and snowmen!